Baby Kruse

Today I had a regularly scheduled 24 week check-up. I haven’t had any further bleeding episodes, which is good. Everything at the visit checked out fine. Baby girl’s heart rate was nice and strong and I am measuring right on track. The nurse was sure I was going to be anemic “because I looked so pale,” but I assured her I am just fair skinned! Sure enough my iron levels were just fine. My blood sugars are all normal so the Dr. thought I could go down to just testing twice a day. I am a little OCD about it so we will see if I can stand not testing after every meal. The Dr. also went over the procedure for a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section). Basically it should go the same as any other delivery except I will have an IV, the baby will be monitored at all times, the Dr. will be at the hospital the entire time I am in labor, and an anesthesiologist will be on call in case of an emergency. I would like as little intervention as possible - the IV is bad enough. I am confident that it will go fine and the hospital is prepared in case of an emergency. I am glad that I will be given the chance to have a med free natural birth.

Now that everything seems to be going well I am trying to relax and just enjoy the pregnancy. It is hard once you have had things go very wrong to anticipate things being ok. I am just trying to take one day at a time. I am still working three days a week, I really like getting out of the house, so working part time is perfect. I am having fun buying little girl things- I should probably get my shopping under control. I think she might have a different outfit for everyday for the first three months. It is all just so cute!

Emily is having a hard time accepting that her baby sister appears to be healthy. We talk daily about all the screenings that have been done, what was wrong with Kevin, and why we know that this baby does not have the same issues that he did. It is hard, but I do my best to reassure her, but also letting her know that life is fragile and we don’t know what is going to happen. Most babies are born healthy and we have no reason to believe that her little sister is anything but perfect. Then she said to me “Well, if they do find something after she is born, it is most likely not life threatening.” I have to admit it broke my heart a little to hear my 9 yr old say this. I know she probably heard me or Matt say it. We talk about life and death and I think she is coming to terms with it. She has had to grow up so much in the past year.  Emily is already getting a little basket of gifts around to give to the baby once she is born. I think that she is going to be a great big sister again.

Matt is doing a great job of keeping us all sane. Being pregnant and grieving does not always leave me in the most stable emotional state. He has been great at laundry, cooking, cleaning,and just stepping up in general to do the things that need to get done. My next appointment is in 4 weeks, I will check back in then.

Uncategorized | 06 Apr 09 @ 02.35 PM